Snow

Around here we don't get a lot of snow, so we get pretty excited when we do get some! This was probably the longest I've ever seen it snow here in Redding.
These next 3 pictures were actually taken at my parents house.
For some reason this picture cracks me up! The picture makes the dogs look a lot closer then they really are. Plus they aren't really fighting, so I'm not a terrible mother! :)



Anyone want to jump?

The Ford dealership.:)

A really private post

Disclaimer: This blog post is by no means a personal attack on anyone I know or do not know. My point is that we all have ways of doing things but it doesn't mean its the best way for everyone else.

It annoys me that people think that people who share their lives are only sharing because they want attention. Just because you may be a really private person doesn’t mean that other people are wrong because they aren’t private. I share a lot on here, not for attention, not for pity, not because my life is so shallow that I have to go to a blog or facebook to share what is happening in my life. I share because it’s my therapy, it’s what I do with my blog. It is how I want my blog to be, honest and real and almost everyone knows a woman who has had fertility issues and it isn’t easy. It’s how I live my life, not beating around the bush just saying it as it is.

It’s easy to think that our own ways are the best ways, but that is SO not true. It is the best way for US and maybe not the best way for someone else!
My opinion is if you get so offended or annoyed at people writing personal stuff then don’t be on facebook or don’t read other peoples blogs!

On that note, I took my first Clomid today, and I’m going to leave that vague just to annoy people! hahaha Also I wore my underwear inside out all day and my bra on backwards.

Just kidding about the bra part, but not the underwear part..

:)

Happy Birthday Camilla!

I CAN NOT believe that my little baby is already 4! Just doesn't seem possible! She has been asking for her birthday party to be at Chuck E Cheese for months now, so I finally gave in. She had a blast so it was worth it!
This is called the ticket blaster, air blows the tickets all around and she tried to catch them. I have a video I'll try to post if it will work! She loved this!

On a ride, she is really good at having her eyes closed for pictures!

Her cute little cake!

How hard is it to get all 3 of us to have our eyes opened and look at the camera? Apparently very hard since we had 3 pictues taken and none of them turned out good!

Camilla with Chuck E Cheese.


She is getting so big and is really turning into this big girl. She is starting to behave better and we are having SO many good days! I am so glad to have her and am so thankful for her sweet little spirit and of wanting to help Mommy with things. A lot of times when I ask her to do something she will so Okay Mommy. Which before it was a fight constantly but she is learning that I am boss! Woohoo! :)
Mommy and Daddy love you so much Camilla!

Today

Is one of those days where I would REALLY like to get into bed and sleep for oh 8 hours or so. My patience has been very thin the last 2 days, not sure why. I don't think I've had any unusual or different stresses. Just the same ones.
I am getting closer and closer to starting the fertility meds. Went in today and took a pregnancy test just to make sure before I start the meds. Of course though I went into the lab and it was like the busiest day ever. So I waited for close to 40 min before they even called me in and then they said we don't have any order for a test. UGH.. Luckily the lab is in the same building as my Dr. so I was able to just walk down the hall to get the paper work. So then after waiting 5 min for that and then waiting another probably 10 min I was able to get the blood drawn which took oh maybe at the most 3 minutes! Meanwhile Camilla is saying repeatedly I don't want to be here, yanking on my purse, yanking on my hands, there is people around coughing and little kids coughing and I can just feel the sickness invading me. So that didn't help my patience level. I think that I am really nervous about taking the medicine because this will really prove if I am able to get pregnant or not. If this medicine doesn't work then I will have to go to a different kind of fertility Dr. which the closest one is in Sacramento, 2.5 hours away which= Big $$. Which we don't have and don't have insurance and as of right now can't afford it. So I'm really nervous because this is in a way maybe my last shot to ever get pregnant unless for some unknown reason my body decides to cooperate which it hasn't been cooperating for close to 3 years now! So I'm trying to relax, trying not to get too ahead of myself and trying to be positive that this will work. It will right? :) Please? I'm tired of worrying about it, just one more child please?
I've appreciated thinking of our weakness appealing to God. Of God just wanting a little bit of willingness and a weakness in ourselves and with that little bit he can do a amazing work in us. "Our weakness Lord appeals to thee, our spirits long for liberty, oh hear our cry, thy holy one, complete the work thou hast begun." I think that is how it goes, I'm too lazy to get up and find my hymn book! But, it is nice to know that we can be weak and ask God for strength and he will give it. Of course the stipulation is of being willing for his will, all of it.
So today I need more patience and more positive thinking! :)

My Granny

My Granny had a stroke last week. It was quite a shock as she has been really healthy her whole life. Thankfully it was a minor stroke, well as minor as you can get. She is recovering really well and the Dr.'s are really impressed with her improvements. I spent 5 days in Reno with her, spent a lot of time in the hospital. Every day I saw improvements, her speech when we first got there I could barely understand what she was saying. But just a few days later it was SO much better!
I learned something during those days in Reno, well a few things. One-My relatives on both sides of my family (Dad's and Mom's) are really close and really care about each other. It is so sad to me how many older people are in care homes and hospitals and never have visitors. They sit day after day probably hoping for someone to come in and cheer them up. Instead the only people the see are Doctors and nurses. We had people in the hospital all hours of the day, all night all day. The only time she was left alone was when the nurses were giving her a bath. You hear a lot and it's sad to say but it's not good to leave people in the hospital by themselves, especially when they can't do very much for them self. Granny had seven kids, all of them but my Mom and her brother Tommy live in the Reno area. They all were there different times of the day and week. All of them talking about changes needing to make at Granny and Papa's house for when she comes home. All of them looking to the future and what they can do to help her recovery and help keep her independence. The reason why all of Granny's kids were there to support her was because she and Papa were good parents. They have a strong marriage and were strong with their discipline and their kids grew up loving them. And now all these years later when their oldest is almost 60 I think, they still love their Mama and want to help her in anyway possible. To me in the day we are living in, that is pretty amazing.
2-After spending days with my 2 Aunts, I see where I get my strong will and willingness to speak my mind. Granted it isn't maybe always best but I don't like people running over me, I will be heard! I see that a lot with them and it is good and bad, so I want to find a balance.
Most of all I appreciate the family I have. We are not all perfect but I'm so glad for the love and care that is shown to me, that helps me along, that encourages me along..
Mom and her parents

HAHA!